Serious I Am

but i am a serious person.

just recently, i learned santa claus was a lie and christmas was a capitalist's game and i cried and cried until i got bored and moved on by unwrapping the red and yellow box under the bedazzled midget tree.

the tree was fake but it didn't bother me because it was just a tree and it didn't give me boxes to unwrap once every year.

i seriously need a real job. i asked santa for one but he was too fake to give me what i wanted. i should have asked editors instead.
  

† Jofer